It seems like every week or so I have to make a whole new commitment to being a good mommy. I find that it always works for the first few days...day...hours...but I find it is something I want to do/be so badly. I just want the simple life. Sometimes I feel I was reallly born in the wrong time...or place. When I go to the Mormon thrift store, I am jealous of the way they dress and are just living their lives apart from what the world thinks is cool. The Amish too. I want to wear a cute bonnet. But I want everyone to also. Not just me. Maybe it's just that I'm not destined for this world, but one that awaits me. It makes me happy when I think of it that way, and helps me to detatch myself from the things of this world. I love to be in the country. We got to go to a big pumpkin patch on thursday, and it was so wonderful. We each picked out a pumpkin (the smallest being for Frannie of course, and the ginormous one being for big papa Curt). I had to convince Jed that he really wanted one with a stem because they were so much better, and he'd better be careful not to break it off. We haven't stuck the knife to any of them yet, but I am very excited. It's been a long time since I've carved a pumpkin. I always remember it as a special time. After we carved, we would go out back and put them on the green wood sandbox lid, and light the candles inside. I of course, wearing my Holly Hobbie nightgown and a sweater of some sort-maybe a red hoodie. I know there's a picture somewhere. I want my kids' memories to be like that. It's so wierd, because I remember what fun I had, and I want them to have the same kind of memories. I was talking with Scott the other day, about how when you're a kid everything seems so great and big. Then when you become the parent, you just want it to be as wonderful for your kids, but because you are now the adult, it never seems quite as good. Though I am sure that they think it's the best thing ever... scaling a haybale pyramid, and running as fast as you can to find the best pumpkin...and, "oh mamma, mamma....look at the little weenie pumpkins....we should get one of those for Winnie!"
It seems like every week or so I have to make a whole new commitment to being a good mommy. I find that it always works for the first few days...day...hours...but I find it is something I want to do/be so badly. I just want the simple life. Sometimes I feel I was reallly born in the wrong time...or place. When I go to the Mormon thrift store, I am jealous of the way they dress and are just living their lives apart from what the world thinks is cool. The Amish too. I want to wear a cute bonnet. But I want everyone to also. Not just me. Maybe it's just that I'm not destined for this world, but one that awaits me. It makes me happy when I think of it that way, and helps me to detatch myself from the things of this world. I love to be in the country. We got to go to a big pumpkin patch on thursday, and it was so wonderful. We each picked out a pumpkin (the smallest being for Frannie of course, and the ginormous one being for big papa Curt). I had to convince Jed that he really wanted one with a stem because they were so much better, and he'd better be careful not to break it off. We haven't stuck the knife to any of them yet, but I am very excited. It's been a long time since I've carved a pumpkin. I always remember it as a special time. After we carved, we would go out back and put them on the green wood sandbox lid, and light the candles inside. I of course, wearing my Holly Hobbie nightgown and a sweater of some sort-maybe a red hoodie. I know there's a picture somewhere. I want my kids' memories to be like that. It's so wierd, because I remember what fun I had, and I want them to have the same kind of memories. I was talking with Scott the other day, about how when you're a kid everything seems so great and big. Then when you become the parent, you just want it to be as wonderful for your kids, but because you are now the adult, it never seems quite as good. Though I am sure that they think it's the best thing ever... scaling a haybale pyramid, and running as fast as you can to find the best pumpkin...and, "oh mamma, mamma....look at the little weenie pumpkins....we should get one of those for Winnie!"
3 Comments:
BIG smile here, thanks for posting Elena!
I think that's so true, that it doesn't seem as exciting to us, because we're old enough to know that it's just a pumpkin patch, but to them it's one big adventure.
I think you're 'right-on' with what you said about enjoying things when you're a kid, and wanting your children to have wonderful experiences,too. And now you get to enjoy them enjoying the experiences.
What a beautiful pumpkin photo!
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